Wanna see if hubby remembers anniversary...

There is no doubt that anniversaries are a huge deal for most people. Whether it is the day they met, their first date, or the day they were married, it marks a celebration. If you are into anniversaries, I completely understand what it must feel like for someone to forget. What I can’t grasp is the desire for people to “test” their significant other. 

Some time back when I was having a casual chat with ma friend she showcased the bitter side of herself uttering, “I want to see if my husband remembers our anniversary . I’m not uttering a word this year. Every year, I have to remind him(Its just been 2 years since they are married). This year, I want to see if he remembers on his own and see what he does. I am not going to forgive him if he forgets.” Instead of waking up, rolling over, planting a kiss on his lips and greeting her husband with, Happy Anniversary, she rolled out of bed, completed her chores, went to work, and was salty all day  because her husband had as usual forgotten her anniversary which was actually supposed to be their anniversary. I would call that a waste of emotions and energy.

Even my hubby is worst when it comes to remembering birthdays and anniversaries. I literally have to remind him the night before, and the morning of any family member’s birthday. This includes his parents, his siblings and even my own. But I just love it that way. He just doesn’t do well with remembering birthdays. He has proven that year after year. But that doesn't make him a bad person or it confirms that he doesn't love us. Its just not his style to remember the dates.

I have always been the neglected one so most of them never remembered my birthday. But I had my own style of celebrating it. I would call up or walk to everyone I love and gift them with some handmade stuff I personally prepare for them sharing love and happiness. That's how a birthday is meant to be, isn't it. 

When you test a person, it almost always ends in failure. And what is really the purpose of the test? If they remember does it mean they love you? If they forget does it mean you chose the wrong person? It really can be as simple as the fact that they are forgetful or they don’t place the same value on one particular day. 

Life is too short to treat your mate like a child. You may as well be saying, “I wonder if he remembered to collect the house keys while leaving. I’m not telling him again. If he didn’t, I am going to ground him when I get home.”

She could have saved a lot of time, energy, and stress just by saying, “Darling, what can we do for our anniversary on Friday?” Decide together if you want to go out to dinner, cook at home, head out for a movie, go on a long drive, lounge whole day on the bed or celebrate with friends and family.  

Trust me, it would have worked out a lot better for both. After all, it’s not just your anniversary. It is a day for both of you.So go wish him without trying to test whether he remembers or not. Its the relationship that's important not the date.

Is my life getting really boring???

I saw a very bizzarre dream this weekend night. I am not calling it bizarre cos it was far too strange. My subconscious is a master in creating strange dreams. I hardly remember of watching a normal dream, but this was BIZARRE. It was so incredibly mundane. I am blaming my subconscious for being such a waste in even creating it.

If this is what I can dream up to at a weekend night than my life is really turning too boring. I actually dreamed of cleaning crockery in the sink of my house. And I did it pretty much the same way I regularly do it. First the spoons and the bowls, then the plates. I must have woke up just before putting my hand on the serving bowl. It wasnt like I was cleaning the bowls and the water in the sink suddenly splashes up like like a huge fountain and then reshapes into a dolphin that dances all over the house. It would have been worth the creation. But this. Not at all, I was just simply, ordinarily cleaning the white porcelain crockery.

Wait, the saddest part is yet to come. After I woke up, I realized that I had actually been dreaming

about it. And the thought that popped into my head was the crockery in my dream had a yellow flower with a green stem on the right side instead of the turquoise blue border design in my original one. What a shame.

Yeah yeah, I am convinced that my life is turning out pretty boring....

Being Human.

The Delhi gang-rape victim has said to have had justice as the accused are sentenced to death. But this is just one case there are so many rapes happening every-time since ages. It is just that now people come out and speak about it. These days there is a hot topic running on news channel debates about being a woman and being a man. Everybody has his own views about being one and i need not discuss them here as you too might have got bored of such debates running everybody. But do we understand that these are just debates it has contributed nothing to the downfall of such heinous crimes. It is all running everyday about what should the men do and what the ladies should not... It is ringing alarmingly men - women -men - women - men- women - .........

But where is the human in them. The behavior of a human being in sexual matters is just a prototype for the whole of his other modes of reaction in life. Why do we have to discriminate every being into a man or a woman. Why cant we be just humans. We must learn to acknowledge the truth that everyone is the same and unique. Our first world is humanity and religion humanism. God created us as humans and expects us to be one. He doesnt expect us to be something else. He knows it that we are humans and just wants us to learn it.

I have been hearing since time that I will teach my boy respect every woman, my girl to respect ever

y man. But is it really necessary. Why cant we just rely on the concept of respecting every human being. Looking at a person must not remind us of his gender, but he being a human very much the same like us. I dont understand why do we people waste our precious time on debating the concepts of evolution and creation against each other. Isnt spiritualism and science one?? That first the souls evolve and then the bodies evolve and then this universe marries them both into a wonderful creation called human being. Why cant we just accept that??

I am just a human similar to you. We might be having differences from within but one thing is same that we are both just humans. We have to start injecting into ourselves the fact of just being a human. Nobody is superior on inferior here. We cant wait passively for millions and millions of years until we evolve a better understanding of ourselves as just the same. God created every individual with all his love to be treated equally. We all parent the best we can, we want perfection for our babies. But we first need to understand it ourselves it is easy to teach the differences but is it necessary to preach the discrimination. Lets grow ourselves into a human being than into being a man/woman.

The main thing in life is not to be afraid of being just human. We should all get obsessed

with the idea of being human. Trust me, the idea of being human is very human.

Its now, or never..

An old lady died last night from the apartment i lived. She stayed on the 3rd floor with 2 sons, 2 daughters-in-law, 3 grand children and a husband. She was a lovely woman who spoke softly to everybody and fulfilled every demand made by anybody who knew her. She died of an heart attack in the midnight. She was never a trouble to anybody despite of her age. She is gone now and at least for some time everybody is gonna miss her.

In the morning when she was brought back from the hospital something caught my attention. Everybody who was addressing her called her a body. Until last night she was called by various names aai, aaji, aunty, mummy, mini, kaku, tai. bai and so on. But now everybody was addressing her as body.

As soon as a person dies, it becomes a body. He/She no more remains the same. In a seconds time your identity becomes body.People start using phrases like "bring the body","lower the body in the grave","lift the body"...... People don't even call you by your name whom you tried to impress your whole life. You are just a body to be disposed off to all those for whom you had lived, beared all the pain, did everything in your life.

Then why do we live to impress such people for whom we become just a body in a fraction of second.  Lots of things an be fixed, things can be fixed. But many a times relationships between people cannot be fixed, because it should not be fixed. You are aboard a ship setting sail, and the other person has joined the inland circus, or is boarding a different ship, and you just cant be with each other anymore. Because you shouldn't be.

We have to forgive, we don't have to like them, we don't have to be friends with everybody, but we have to forgive them, to ignore, to overlook. Otherwise we would be ending up tying rocks to our feet heavier than our wings could carry. Why do we have to think about making life better for other people who don't even deserve us. Choose your lifes battles wisely. After all life is not counted by the battles you stood up to fight. Its not that every battle you win makes you happy. Ask yourself, Does it??? 

What counts is how many times you turned around to chose  better direction. Life is too short for anything. Fight only the most most most important battles and let the rest just go. The wildest journey is the journey to your inner self. the most exciting thing to discover is the portrait of your soul.

So take chances, spend money on everything that you love, live like a wild storm, do all the stupid things that you have always wanted to do, sing aloud in your shrilly voice, dance madly in the rain, be childlike. Do whatever you have always wanted to do.

What is important to understand is that death is not the greatest loss in life. Loss is when life dies inside you when you are alive. So celebrate this occasion called life. Its now or never....

 

Love Life!! Live Life!!

 

Bruises....

It was 11:30 p.m., time to wash off the days sweat and try to find some sleep. It was her daily routine but today something strange happened. While scrubbing her hands she found some marks. They appeared like she had acquired them in some sort of an accident she never remembered.

She ignored it and started to scrub her body and she found another mark on her leg. she was totally amused by finding some more marks on her body of which she could trace no memories. She looked herself in the mirror carefully. She had grown pale, the face shouted dullness with wrinkles showing promptly their existence. The hands had grown thin and the skin on the neck was sagging.

She found some sparkling greys too with a spectacular decrease in the overall hair density. She wondered in confusion who the lady in the mirror was. Trying to get the thought of her mind she moved briskly experiencing deep ache in her back. Closing the seat of the potty she sat down there. She definitely didnt have the energy of the youth she remembered herself from. She had turned weak, frail, doddery, hoary, senile, unvenerable, but when????

She searched back in her life to know when it happened. All she could find in the memories were her kids, hubby, family, responsibilities,mother and father-in-law, their illness, kids school, then college, hubby's work, his work tours, kids growing, finding themselves job, moving away with their partners, moving into her own house, turning the house into a home, working on every minute detail to let it find its space. But she failed to find herself and her space.

 Everything had changed, and she remembered every small transition in the change process. She had been ridiculously busy all her life. She had time for everybody who needed her everytime. She remembered everything about everyone in her life except herself. She has had everything but Where was she in her life????

She thought old age comes suddenly and not gradually as is thought. Old age is like plane through a storm , once you are aboard nothing can be done but to live with it.The complete life, the perfect pattern, includes old age as well as youth and maturity. The beauty of the morning and the radiance of noon are good, but it would be a very silly person who drew the curtains and turned on the light in order to shut out the tranquillity of the evening. Old age has its pleasures, which, though different, are not less than the pleasures of youth.